Monday, March 13, 2006

Throwin' Grease

85 days until the June draft and I'm stuck in central Georgia listening to Goldie praise the virtues of the WHIP ratio. Quite frankly I'd rather be hunting with Dick Cheney, but I'm trying to have an open mind.

And yes, I did see the three prospects that Goldie had been hounding me to see. All with outstanding WHIP and Strikeout to Walk ratios, according to him. I was somewhat impressed with the movement of one of the pitchers. That was until he began to annoy me with his constant fidgeting. Rubbing his fingers under his cap, touching his face, wiping his brow, scratching his ears, picking his nose, adjusting his cup, and doing it all over again before the next pitch. I swear I was watching Gaylord Perry. In fact, his pitches were moving just like Perry's. Indeed, way too much movement to be legit.

"He's throwing grease," I announced to Goldie, like he would even know what I just said.

"No way, old man," he responded. "It's a hard slider."

I didn't know which was worse. The fact that he just called me an old man or that he was in complete denial of the cheater in his midst. As I was about to lay into him, his cell phone started to beep. I expected him to answer but he simply flipped open his phone and began to read something.

"Aren't you going to answer it?" I asked.

He sighed like he was trying to tell me that I'm a couple generations behind the technology curve. He showed me the screen of his cell phone. It was a text message that read, "7 pm tomorrow okay? Shawn."

It didn't make too much sense to me until Goldie explained that Shawn was none other than the area's top high school pitching prospect, Shawn Bankman. And that we have an appointment to discuss signability issues with him and his parents tomorrow at their home in Albany. Apparently Goldie's been trying to have an open mind as well. This should be interesting.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cutter -- you'd be safe hunting with Cheney. He only shoots lawyers. And when it comes to shooting lawyers, Cheney is non-partisan. He'd just as soon shoot a Democrat lawyer as a Republican lawyer.

11:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

WHIP isn't refered to as a ratio. It's just WHIP.

2:40 AM  

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